Quotations

More funny messages, cartoons, sayings... Part 5

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Members of our companion Facebook page often post funny cartoons, though-provoking messages, spiritual passages etc. We have re-posted some of them here. Others, we pick up from spiritual and religious web sites on the Internet.

We generally have no idea from where they originate. If you are the creator of one of these messages or images, and want it changed or deleted, please Email us at:

This is a continuation of a previous list

Top Ten Reasons Why Witches Don't Worship Satan:

• 10: Scorch marks on the furniture whenever Satan manifests.
• 9: Not even Lysol can mask the smell of brimstone.
• 8: Hard to keep flaming goat's skulls lit.
• 7: Decreased availability of blonde virgins.
• 6: Blood stains from the sacrifices are *impossible* to get out of the carpet.
• 5: Wailing of the damned souls in hell keeps the neighbors awake.
• 4: The cats keep attacking Satan's tail, which annoys him.
• 3: Repeated stooping motions for administering the Kiss of Shame (is difficult on the older coven members).
• 2: Demons smell even worse than brimstone
• AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON WHY WITCHES DON'T WORSHIP SATAN:
  • 1: Impossible to worship something that doesn't exist!!

"Nothing to believe in here. Move along."

Free health exams:

Amusing church sign:

A goal for each day:

Even cats are divided between believers and atheists:

A funny church sign with what is probably an unintended slur on left-handed people:

Psalms 16:11: "Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in thy presence [is] fulness of joy; at thy right hand [there are] pleasures for evermore."

An interesting attempt to simultaneously poke fun at three beliefs:

This The three are the Catholic Church's ban on the use of condoms, their ban on abortion even if a pregnant woman will die without one, and Rep. Todd Akin's (R-MO) belief that a "legitimate" rape rarely results in pregnancy:

No copyright claimed for obvious reasons.
Original posting: 2011-OCT-26
Latest update: 2012-SEP-08
Author: B.A. Robinson

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