Inter-faith marriages a.k.a. mixed,
mixed-faith, or inter-religious marriages
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Quotes about inter-faith marriages and families:
"A [born-again conservative Christian] believer marrying or intending to marry an unbeliever is clearly going
against the expressed commandment of God." J.J. Lim
"...unity within diversity adds a richness and beauty to marriage and to life." Rev. Tom Chulak,
Unitarian-Universalist minister.
"More and more interfaith couples are opting to forge their own
paths in the spiritual realm by combining aspects of both religions
rather than relying on the strict guidelines promoted by either
organized religion. And while many religious leaders turn their backs on
such decisions, who are they to put limits on God?" Jill Critchley,
a Christian engaged to a Jew.
"I have two religions, but mommie and daddy have one [each]. Mommie
has Jesus and daddy has JewIsh." Claire, aged about 4, from the
movie "Mixed Blessings."
The arrival of a baby forces parents to confront their religious
legacies, to reconsider decisions made long ago and to revisit the spiritual
dilemmas of their own youth." Gabrielle Glaser.
Overview:
An inter-faith marriage is a union in which the two spouses follow
different religious traditions. This can take many forms. For example, the partners may be:
A member of a specific religion and a follower of an non-theistic ethical system (e.g. Judaism and Humanism).
From two religions that are totally different - as in one Western and one Eastern faith (e.g. Christianity and
Taoism).
From two religions that have some points of similarity - as in two Abrahamic religions. These are religions
"of the Book" which share Abraham as a Patriarch. (e.g. Christianity and Islam).
From different major divisions within the same religion (e.g. Roman Catholicism and Protestantism).
From different wings within the same religion (e.g. one Evangelical and one liberal or mainline Christian)
From different traditions within the same wing of the same religion (e.g. two conservative denominations:
Assemblies of God and Southern Baptist.
All marriages and other lifetime partnerships are mixed relationships!
Most involve persons of two genders: one man and one woman. Sometimes the two spouses are
of different religions, nationalities, races, ethnic groups, economic levels, etc. The
more significant differences in background that a couple has, the greater are the challenges
that need to be resolved before and during marriage. Sometimes their efforts to reach a consensus can draw the couple
closer together. With other couples, their differences will drive them apart.
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Some definitions:
Marriages between persons of different religions are called: inter-faith,
interfaith, mixed,
mixed-faith, inter-religious marriages. We will use the term "inter-faith"
in this series of essays.
Marriages between persons who follow different traditions within the same religion: inter-church,
two-church, interchristian, cross-community, inter-denominational, intra-faith or
ecumenical marriage. We will use the term "intra-faith."
We will use the term "marriage" inclusively throughout this series of essays to
refer to all permanent, committed, cohabiting relationships, whether they are the result
of religious marriages, civil marriages, union ceremonies, or "common law"
or "living together" relationships.
Problems that arise in intra-faith marriages are not necessarily less severe
than among inter-faith marriages. A liberal Christian and a conservative
Christian couple will generally find that they differ on almost all religious
matters; a liberal Jew and liberal Christian will see eye-to-eye on many
religious beliefs.